Advice regarding first dates {for the ladies}.

Yeah, I know I’m single – and I’m sure that automatically causes you to think that I know absolutely nothing about relationships, how to handle a date, or how to win a guy’s heart. Well, If that’s what you think, then more power to you. But I probably know more than you think.

This post is primarily for girls who are going on a “first date” with a guy. But the rest of you could probably learn something from this as well. Read on.

When you go on that first date it’s exciting. It’s new. It’s scary. It’s nerve-racking. It comes with doubts. It makes you extra self-conscious. Oh, and the butterflies… don’t forget them.

Here are some suggestions I can offer:

1. Just be yourself. If he doesn’t like you for you really are, then you are not meant for each other.

2. Please, be a lady. Don’t let every other word out of your mouth be a cuss word. Don’t belch at the table. If at all possible, laugh quietly – instead of throwing your mouth open while you bellow with hysterical laughter from the deepest part of your gut. Go ahead, picture it… it’s not really that attractive.

3. Lay off on the makeup. I understand that sometimes the barn needs painting. I understand that sometimes there are blemishes that need covering. However, caking it on so that you resemble a clown’s second cousin isn’t necessary. If he wanted to date someone from the KISS, he would’ve asked them directly.

4. Put some clothes on. And by that I mean, something that actually covers you. Do you want him to spend the entire date staring at your chest, or at your face? How is he supposed to fall in love with your smile if he’s too distracted to even look at it? Don’t show him everything on the first date – that comes later, with marriage. Be a mystery; be something that he’s not used to going on a date with.

5. Don’t pretend to be interested in his interests if you’re not. This may seem harsh, but it’s better to be honest in the beginning, then to be fake with him. He’ll respect you for your honesty – and if he doesn’t, then I would question his character.

6. If he complains a lot, talks a lot about his “problems,” gives you the sad story, acts needy, or performs any other acts of childishness or smothering-ness – run!

7. After the date, don’t be the first one to make contact again. Let HIM chase YOU. You’re the prize, and he’s supposed to be the knight in shining armor. Don’t be an easy catch; make him work for you, earn your notice, and win your heart.

8. If all he does is talk about himself, interrupts you, is fake with you, is on his phone (either texting, browsing the web, or calling someone) every 3 minutes, or is constantly checking out other girls while he’s with you – again, run! Do you really want to date a Kanye West wanna-be?

9. If he proudly admits that he still lives with his mother, she does his laundry for him, or his eardrum-bursting loud sports car costs more than your house – you should probably (again) run! If there’s a legitimate reason why he’s stilling living at home, then fine. But be sure to get the facts. And remember, “facts” are truth – not some stupid fabricated excuse he made up on the spot.

10. If he starts talking marriage on the first date – run! If he starts talking about how he wants children right away – run! And lastly, if he intends to live off your pay check… run!

Hey, I’m just trying to help. Honestly. You don’t want to date a boy. You want a man. So, happy dating.

This is by no means an exlusive list of do’s and dont’s – surely, I’ve missed a few. Please feel free to fill in the blanks via the comment box below. 🙂

** If you don’t date, then hang on to your hat… a post about “why I gave up dating” is coming soon! **

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Posted on November 30, 2010, in Relationships and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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