Waiting is the hardest part.
“Marilla, isn’t it nice to think that tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it yet?”
“I’ll warrant you’ll make plenty in it,” said Marilla. “I never saw your beat for making mistakes, Anne.”
“Yes, and well I know it,” admitted Anne mournfully. “But have you ever noticed one encouraging thing about me, Marilla? I never make the same mistake twice.”
“I don’t know as that’s much benefit when you’re always making new ones.”
“Oh, don’t you see, Marilla? There must be a limit to the mistakes one person can make, and when I get to the end of them, then I’ll be through with them. That’s a very comforting thought.”
…that sums up how I’m feeling right now. Only, I seem to have the ability to make the same mistake twice. *sigh*
So here I sit this morning, eating my cheese bagel loaded down with cream cheese and drinking my orange juice. And I wonder: “Lord, what do You have for me today? What can I do that will bring glory to You?”
Waiting. I’m not good at it. I don’t like to sit still. So I end up rushing things… I make like a bull in a china shop and force my way through. Another mistake. And I keep making them. It’s part of my human nature… and my personality.
I know He has something big for me. I know He has a plan for my life – something that only I can complete. A story all my own to write; I’m to make a difference only I can make. I’m excited about the prospects. But I’m not always excited about the waiting.
“Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD.” ~ Psalm 27:14
Sometimes the waiting is the hardest part. Sometimes the silence hurts the most. Sometimes being surrounded by people is when you’re most alone.
“…but God, You aren’t moving fast enough. I want to know now! I don’t think I can wait any longer!”
“Patience… just. be. patient.”
“God? Hello…? Aren’t You listening to me…? Why aren’t You giving me an answer?”
“I did answer you. I told you to wait. Aren’t you listening to Me?”
And on and on it goes. So here I am… anxiously waiting. Working on the patience part. Struggling. Hanging on. Waiting…