Here, Honey… you can have the rest.

How many boyfriends have you had? How many guys have you confessed feelings for? I have had several; in fact, looking back on it all now, it’s rather embarrassing. I’ll be honest and say that it’s quite a chore to have to sit there and try to count them all – and they were all within a span of about 6 years. I’m not proud of my relationship history – especially when I remember who some of the guys were.

A few years ago I was dating a guy whom my parents didn’t care for at all. Sure, he was an extremely “nice guy” but not the type of guy I should have been considering spending the rest of my life with. Our relationship started on shaky ground and ended in one of the most hurtful ways I can imagine.

When he told me how he felt about me and asked me to be his girlfriend I was thrilled. Of course I said yes! A few nights later while he and I were talking on the phone, he asked me a question… “Heather, have you ever felt this way for anyone? Have you ever cared this much for any of your past boyfriends…? Or am I the first one?”

Eeep! I felt like I was caught between a rock and a hard place. I wanted to say he was the first. But I knew I would be lying to him if I did. However, I wanted him to feel special… I didn’t want to ruin the moment. So I lied.

That relationship lasted a grand total of about five months.

As I look back on all the relationships I’ve been in, that question I was once asked still rings loud in my mind. However, instead of another boyfriend asking me, I keep picturing my future husband asking me that question one day (whoever he may be). What will I ever say to him? Of course, I will tell him the truth.

In fact, I picture my end of the conversation will go something like this:

“It’s true… I’ve been in a lot of relationships before you. There have been many other boys who have been “in love” with me before. And yes, well… I said I loved them too. Obviously those relationships didn’t last long… in fact, they usually ended in heartbreak. And when the man walked out of my life, he’d always take a piece of my heart with him. Over and over again I put myself through the process with the next boyfriend.

No matter how much I wish I could, I’ll never be able to give you ALL of my heart. I’m so sorry. I wish it wasn’t like this – and it could have been different – but I made choices that I can’t undo. I can’t go back and change anything now. But here, Babe… you can have what’s left of my heart…”

That’s my story. But yours doesn’t have to be that way. Granted, I realize that the majority of my readers are young adults. And I’m sure many of you have probably had a few relationships in your lifetime that (obviously) didn’t last. Sure, we all make mistakes. We all make choices that we’ll regret later in life. Are you going to keep making them though? Or do you want your “love-life” to be different? Do you want to have a unique love story? One that can only happen because God orchastrated it?

That’s what I want. I want a love story so perfect, so romantic, so out-of-this-world (yet completely and 100% true) that the only way it could have possibly ever happened was because God wrote it. Have you ever read some of the love stories that are in the Bible?! They beat Cinderella and Snow White every time! God is such a romantic and a wonderful Author. He won’t lead you astray. He wants to give you the best He has! Listen to your parents – God will work through them. Listen to your Pastor and your Youth Pastor – God will use them to speak to you. Read your Bible and seek God’s will for your life. Pray – ask God to help you trust Him with the area of your love life. Pray for your future husband – whoever he may be… God knows!

Isn’t that exciting! God hand-created someone perfect for you and me. There is a man somewhere out there who is a perfect fit just for me. No other woman can meet his needs or love him like I will be able to one day. It thrills me that God cared that much for me to take the time and plan every area of my future thousands of years before I was ever present on this earth! What a wonderful, loving, amazing Father we have!

Oh, and by the way! If there happens to be any guys reading, this isn’t just for the ladies – this applies to you as well. God has hand-crafted and picked out His perfect will for you to marry as well. Just be patient. Wait. God’s time is perfect, and when He sees that you are ready and able He’ll make your paths to cross.


Posted on August 1, 2010, in Relationships and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 5 Comments.

  1. Once again, very excellent Heather! I’ve always told my kids as they were growing up dating teaches people how to harden their hearts and prepare them for divorce (sounds like the words from an old guy huh?). Thank you for a positive post about God’s possibilities for biblical romance.

  2. You’re on your way to being the female Josh Harris! Ha.
    Really though, people can’t hear it enough; even outside of the teen group, that’s for sure.
    And one day all the waiting will seem like a flash if we’re serving Him!
    “And Jacob served seven years for Rachel; and they seemed unto him but a few days, for the love he had to her.”

    • Nick! I wanted to let you know that I printed out that “book” you sent me, and I plan to read it all tonight. 🙂 I can’t wait to read it! I’ll shoot you an e-mail once I’m done with it; however, I’m sure I’ll love it and completely agree with it.
      Have a fantastic day!
      ~ Heather Joy

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