Mission: Modesty (part 1)

I know. You took one look at the title, made a distorted facial expression, and were half-tempted to close this page. But you’re still reading at this point, so we’re off to a good start.

I have been dealing personally with the issue of “pants vs. skirts” in my life. *gasp! Oh no she didn’t…!* Oh, yes I did. Stay with me though…

I have grown up wearing skirts and dresses all my life. However, I also argued and fought with my parents about it every step of the way. Because my parents standard wasn’t MY standard, I felt that it was being forced on me. Which, I suppose, in a way it was. But it was their house, their rules – my job was to simply obey.

“Fine! I’ll obey your rules now, because I have to, but one day I will wear pants… because I don’t share your same conviction.”
Mom would just look at me and smile while I continued my tirade. And when I’d finally stop rambling on about how I disagreed with her, she’d speak up: “Well, that’s a few years off yet, and when you have your own children maybe then you’ll understand the importance behind it. one day you’ll realize this is the right thing to do.”
In reply, I’d begin another outburst: “Mom! There’s nothing *wrong* with pants! They’re not sinful!”
She stopped arguing with me after awhile – she realized I wasn’t going to “get it” no matter what she said.

Eventually I became gutsy enough to hide pants in my parent’s house and wear them whenever I hung out with my “group of friends.” I’d change into pants in my car on the way to wherever I was going, and then I would change back into my skirt on the way home. After pants became a norm for me, I started progressing into other areas of dress. Skimpy shirts, mini skirts, shorts, dresses missing half the material on the top, and bikinis. I wore it all; I had no boundaries – well, very few.

After I was back in right relationship with the Lord, He began dealing with me about several issues. My modesty (i.e. clothing) being one of them. About a week and a half ago I bagged up 75% of the pants I owned and dropped them off at the Salvation Army. I was holding back about 3 or 4 pairs… “just in case.” The Tuesday following my Salvation Army drop-off run, I went to my church to practice with the trio I play the piano for. When I walked into the auditorium they were having a discussion about clothing… mainly the “pants vs. skirts” issue. Ironic, is it not? God was dealing with all three of those girls with the same exact issue (at the same exact time) that He was dealing with me about! Kirstyn and Kristina had been raised the same way I was. Kirstyn wore her first pair of pants once she got married. Kristina has always worn skirts. I rebelled against my parents, and thus wore pants when I shouldn’t have. Jessica was not raised the way we were, but since being married has adopted the “skirts only” standard for herself and now for her daughter.


Stay tuned for part two!


Posted on July 19, 2010, in Modesty and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 8 Comments.

  1. I was raised in a very different household, and I’ve grown into a very different person than yourself. For example, it is a rare thing to see me in a skirt. Much as I often balk at ideas of modesty (and faith, for that matter) I can’t help but respect your choice to do what feels right for you.

    I sometimes wish there was less pressure on girls to dress provocatively or modestly, and more encouragement for girls to be true to themselves.

  2. You’ve got my attention, Heather. 😀

    And for what it’s worth, I do wear pants now and again. (I never like the way they feel.)

    Love you, dear!

  3. cindy sharpeta

    very brave of you….with some it is not even an issue….and some people just fon’t get it, and honestly I have wondered why God does not show to some what He shows to others..that still stumps me.. but one thing i do know is in the churches my husband has pastored is people will do what they want to do and there are some who truly will seek God honestly for answers…I could be here all night, writing about this…as you know, i have five daughters….and not a secret, but i was not raised up with the “skirts” only…actually i have bever even heard about standards and how we need to guard our testimony untill Bro. hasbrook came….oh man…that;s a story…when I met my husband, he also believed in the only dress issue…which i fought while we dated….surprise, huh?? will tell the rest, later….love you… if eel bad about leaving you hanging….

  4. we all need to dress modestly no matter what our convictions are. I see Christian women at church and wonder how they could wear some of the things they do. my girls were skirt only girls until they worked in jobs that didnt allow them to do so.

  5. Rebecca Worden

    Your timing is so interesting Heather! I still wear pants, but I JUST donated 90% of my jeans to my brother’s garage sale! How funny is that? I usually wear a pants suit to work (I’m in sales) and it’s just habit. Since coming to Parkview, I am more drawn to dresses and skirts and I have drastically changed my wardrobe and Hannah’s. I never paid attention to it before and now I notice jeans that are too tight and “form fitting”. I have also dressed “modestly” in terms of no low cut shirts, etc.. but I have always wore jeans and have allowed Hannah too as well. It’s so intersting because just in the past few weeks Chrissy and Hannah have said that they feel like “better Christian young ladies” when they wear skirts. (Their exact words) I thought WOW the things that children can teach us! We donated all of Hannah’s jeans too. She may still wear a loose pair of dress pants or kacki pants, but she really loves and feels better being in a skirt and so does Chrissy.

  1. Pingback: Mission: Modesty (part 2) « Grow Up!

  2. Pingback: Mission: Modesty (part 3) « Grow Up!

  3. Pingback: Confessions of a RIFB girl of 20-something {I wear snow pants.} « Grow Up!

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